How Can I Help Myself?

There are a number of different counselling organizations, such as Relate, which help people whose relationships are in trouble. They can be located through your GP’s surgery or Citizens’ Advice Bureau, or you can find them in Yellow Pages. Some medical centres also run couple therapy clinics (your GP may be able to refer you). However, therapists now recognize the value of self-help in getting to grips with relationship problems.

Various psychological therapies have been used to help treat sexual problems for many years, and all have their own particular way of looking at problems. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) unites two very important elements, combining ‘thinking' and ‘doing'. Thinking (and perhaps talking about) and understanding why you have a problem can be very helpful but you will need to go a bit further than this, and take action. CBT not only focuses on changing behaviour but looks at the thinking patterns and motives underlying our behaviour.